Hello there, it’s Rebecca Cooper Traynor, your trusted matchmaker and dating/relationship expert of 15 years. Today, I’m here to provide some valuable insights into the world of relationships and the honest effort it takes to make them thrive.
Welcome to Match Me Canada’s newsletter, where I share weekly doses of free dating and relationship advice to assist and support you as you navigate the ups and downs of building and nurturing meaningful connections.
I’m here to share a truth that might shatter some dreams but can also be incredibly liberating: there’s no such thing as a perfect relationship.
While falling in love may be the easy part, the real challenge lies in staying in love.
I’ve been married to my husband for a decade now, and I deeply love him. As the years have passed, I’ve delved deeper into life’s complexities – juggling roles as a wife, mother, and busy businesswoman and navigating countless other stressors. It’s important to acknowledge that life’s pressures can take their toll, but I’ve learned that open communication is our lifeline.
In the earlier stages of my relationships, conversations often revolved around trivial matters that didn’t truly strengthen our connection.
However, everything changed when I met Mike. We both had strong opinions and a deep desire to explore our thoughts and feelings together. Surprisingly, it worked wonders!
Having a partner with whom I can comfortably share my vulnerabilities has reshaped my perspective on what a healthy relationship entails and what meaningful conversations should look like. Throughout our journey, we’ve had our fair share of tough conversations – about our pasts, our formative years, feeling unseen in our relationship, the challenges of early motherhood, and personal and professional disappointments.
Mike and I share a bond that goes beyond life partners; we are also the closest of friends. While I cherish the company of long-time and newfound friends, I firmly believe that having friends outside of a relationship is not only healthy but also essential. However, what sets Mike apart is the trust and openness we share. There’s no need for me to confide in a friend behind his back, as is often the case with best friends, because I can authentically express my thoughts and feelings with him, even when the conversation is difficult. In our eyes, our partner should seamlessly become an extension of ourselves, and it’s the bedrock of our strong connection – an unwavering commitment to honesty and transparency.
A lack of substantial communication and vulnerability is a common issue in many relationships. Couples often overlook the importance of introspection and self-discovery, which are crucial steps before opening up to their partners. The concept of growing, healing, and facing life’s challenges together can seem unimaginable when there’s a gap in understanding.
So, what if we made a commitment to nurture our own souls, to be our own best friends, and to speak our truth? Your relationship will flourish when you ask of your partner what you are willing to give to the relationship. At the end of the day, we all long to be truly noticed and understood by our partners.
It’s time to embrace the real work behind successful relationships, where vulnerability, communication, and self-discovery pave the path to a love that grows stronger with time.
