Hey fabulous singles! It’s Rebecca Cooper Traynor here from Match Me Canada. After 15 years of matchmaking and date coaching, I’ve seen so many singles come to me with one goal in mind: to find their “perfect” match. And while we all have standards (yes, please, hold those high!), there’s something I always tell my clients—it’s worth getting real about ourselves if we want a relationship that’s the real deal.
Take a recent client of mine, for example. She’s looking for someone fit, stylish, and always “done up” to look their best. The twist? She’s working on her fitness goals herself, and—let’s be honest—doesn’t dress to the nines every day either. And she’s not alone! Many of us have high expectations for a partner without pausing to ask if we’re embodying those qualities ourselves. The truth? Finding someone who aligns with you starts with reflecting on what you bring to the table.
So if you’re looking for that special someone who’s got it all, here’s a little guide on how to bring some openness and authenticity to your search.
How to Find Real Love—Not Just a Fantasy
1. Focus on Shared Values, Not Perfection
When you want a partner who’s fit and polished, focus on aligning your own values with theirs rather than chasing a perfect image. Maybe you’re both working on fitness goals, or you both care about showing up well in life. These shared priorities are what make a relationship last.
2. Ask Questions, Not Judgments
Instead of making snap judgments based on appearances, try curiosity. Ask questions like, “I’m working on making fitness a priority—how about you?” or “I see you have a casual style; do you like dressing up sometimes too?” You’d be surprised at the insight and connection a genuine question can bring.
3. Reflect on What You’re Offering
Ask yourself: Are you seeking qualities that you’re bringing to the table, too? If fitness or style matters, great—check if you’re investing in those areas of your own life. Real attraction happens when both people are aligned in their values and goals.
4. Remember, We’re Here to Make Matches, Not Manufacture Perfection
As a matchmaker, my role isn’t to create an idealized version of someone but to help you find someone who truly fits your real life. The most meaningful relationships are grounded in acceptance, growth, and mutual respect.
If you’re ready to find a partner who’s as real as they come, I’m here to help you meet them. Let’s get you on the path to a relationship that’s aligned with who you are. Book a call with me here, and let’s make love happen, imperfections and all.
With love and a little tough love,
