Let’s get real: finding love isn’t easy, and honestly? It’s not your job to have all the answers—it’s mine. I’m Rebecca Cooper Traynor from Match Me Canada, and I’ve been helping singles navigate this wild world of dating for 15 years. Trust me, I’m better at maneuvering the apps, messaging matches, and decoding profiles than most people could ever be. It’s what I do, and I love it.
You wouldn’t believe the stories I’ve heard after helping hundreds of singles find love. Every challenge, every frustration, every “Is this ever going to happen?” moment—you name it, I’ve seen it. And guess what? It does work out. Whatever you’re feeling right now, someone else has been there, too—and I’ve helped them come out on the other side. So, it’s going to work out for you too.
The key? Stay connected to yourself, don’t be afraid to ask for help (ahem! That’s where I come in), and keep your focus on the goal. Don’t let the frustration of the dating scene trip you up. The right connection is closer than you think.
I’m here to guide you through this, and trust me—it’s all going to be worth it.
Let’s get real for a second: dating isn’t always smooth sailing. You meet someone amazing, things are going great, and then—bam!—you find out they’re still tight with their ex. Whether they’re going out for dinner, catching a show, or even hanging out regularly, it can leave you feeling a little… uneasy.
But don’t panic! You’re not alone. This is a super common challenge in dating, and with the right approach, you can handle it confidently and keep your relationship on solid ground.
Step 1: Check in with Yourself Before you bring it up, take a moment to reflect. Why does your partner’s relationship with their ex make you feel uneasy? Maybe it’s triggering a fear of being replaced, or maybe you’ve had bad experiences with exes in the past. Whatever it is, get clear on what’s making you feel this way so you can express your concerns without letting jealousy take over.
Step 2: Open Up a Conversation Here’s where dating support comes into play: communication is key. It’s totally okay to feel uncomfortable about your partner’s ex, but the way you express those feelings matters. Instead of coming from a place of accusation, say something like, “I’ve noticed you’re still close with your ex, and I’d love to talk about it because I’ve been feeling a bit uneasy.”
The goal is to open a conversation, not create conflict.
Step 3: Get the Full Picture Every relationship is different, and not every ex is a threat to your relationship. In fact, your partner might see their ex as more of a friend or confidant than anything romantic. So, take time to understand the dynamic. Why is your partner still close with this person? What role does the ex play in their life now?
Understanding this can help you feel more secure about where you stand in the relationship.
Step 4: Discuss Boundaries It’s okay to want boundaries in place when it comes to exes. Once you’ve had that initial talk, you can work together to figure out what feels comfortable for both of you. Maybe it means being more open about when they see each other or even including you in some of their interactions. The important thing is that you’re working together to set boundaries that make you feel supported and respected.
Step 5: Watch Actions, Not Just Words Here’s the thing about dating: words are great, but actions speak louder. If your partner is saying all the right things but still being secretive or dodgy when it comes to their ex, that’s something to pay attention to. Healthy relationships are built on trust and transparency, and you deserve both.
Step 6: Focus on Building Trust At the end of the day, a relationship with an ex doesn’t have to be a dealbreaker. If your partner is open, honest, and respects the boundaries you’ve set together, that’s a great sign. But if they’re hiding things or being dishonest, then it’s time for a bigger conversation about trust.
In any relationship, it’s normal to feel a little wobbly when exes are involved. But with clear communication, healthy boundaries, and a commitment to honesty, you can navigate this situation with confidence and keep your relationship strong.
Much Love,
Rebecca xx
